Time, failures, and the problem in many communities

MONDAY, 5 OCTOBER 2009

In the words of a popular Afrikaans poet: “I presumed so much, I believed so much, and yet, I proved so little.” Or, to quote Steven Wright: “If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.”

Well, I did believe a lot, and propagated much. I did try a lot of things and I am still trying, and what might be called conventional success eludes me still – just about, I might add. I always believe I am hot on its trail.

Finally, I wear my failures and my embarrassments like a boxer wears his scars – it isn’t who I am, but it does say: I’ve been in the ring. I don’t hide the proof, and I do not wear a mask.

FRIDAY, 16 OCTOBER 2009

Why I do not make more money, explanation number 78:

From the beginning, in May 2006, I focused on the short-term; I never focused on developing online brands and online properties and monetising them for long-term income. I worked on things that I thought would quickly make up for lost income from classes that had been cancelled during my visit to South Africa in April 2006.

Also, as I noted at some point, I had underestimated some things, and I made other things more complicated than they were.

And it probably doesn’t help that I am the kind of person who wants to find his own way rather than to listen to what other people who have already achieved a measure of success in a particular area have to say, and then to follow neatly in their footsteps.

THURSDAY, 29 OCTOBER 2009

A lot happens in two years – in other words, many things change, and the consciousness develops that two years were a long time. Little happens in, say the last 41 months – that is, there is little or no change in living and working environments, few or no new friends, routine stays more or less the same, and the consciousness develops that “the last few years have simply slipped by”.

Mark the passing of time with change, or feel time slipping through your fingers. One example: Leaving the city for a weekend every few months usually works like a charm.

FRIDAY, 30 OCTOBER 2009

A problem in many communities in far too many countries:

– X-number of people with no money, no roots, no hope, and no interest in the welfare of the community.

– Drugs are freely available.

– Weapons are easy to get hold of.

– Plenty of vulnerable targets.

SATURDAY, 31 OCTOBER 2009

I have a bit of an obsession with the Springsteen lyric that says, “Down here it’s just winners and losers and don’t get caught on the wrong side of that line.” [from “Atlantic City” on the Nebraska album]

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