TUESDAY, 28 SEPTEMBER 2004
Two black-and-white truths
1. If I had stopped eating on Wednesday 28 July 2004, I would probably have been dead by now. It can therefore be said that one of the reasons I am still alive is because I did not stop eating two months ago.
2. If I have not been celibate and alone for the past 21 months, “The Personal Agenda of Brand Smit” would most likely not have been written.
WEDNESDAY, 29 SEPTEMBER 2004
Social baptism of fire
To move from “perfect solitude” to the more humane alternative I have to go through a baptism of fire. Is it necessary to say that I fear failure? Is it necessary to mention that I fear rejection?
Why would you still feel compelled to move forward? Because you are holding on to that straw of a possibility that you will not fail, that you won’t be rejected. And if your social appearance is more or less successful, you may just experience life in ways you had to manage without in your so-called perfect solitude.