At my happiest – choices and actions

THURSDAY, 11 AUGUST 2005

14:10

It is good to live in harmony with your surroundings. It is good to compare your life with the lives of other people and to come to the conclusion that your choices are also good, and explainable; that they can even be offered to others as a valid option for an adult at the time and environment in which you live.

I would like to believe that I do not need the approval or endorsement of others. What I do want is to be able to look at my own life and to be able to declare with conviction that my life is also good, that the choices I have made were right for me, that my life also has a claim to wall space in the Gallery of Adult Lives.

16:37

Boring Fact That I Have Recited So Many Times That I Can Repeat It In My Sleep, Number One: I am at my happiest when I am working on my own projects – when I am busy with free, creative work under my own control.

* * *

“At your happiest?” someone might ask. “What about your relationship?”

Reply: If I were not in a good relationship, the fulfilment I experience when I am busy with my own work would have been mixed with quite a few other emotions. Without my creative work, without my projects, I would not be half the man that I currently am in my relationship. Among other things, I would have constantly questioned my own value and attractiveness as a person and a partner.

SUNDAY, 14 AUGUST 2005

11:41

I, myself, and the truth about madness and lies: from a dream

SUNDAY, 21 AUGUST 2005

22:30

Each of us is the result of choices that thousands of people made over the centuries, and actions they took or did not take or took by error – from an impulsive decision to get on a boat to another continent or not to get on a boat that eventually ended up on the bottom of the ocean, to swords that just missed an important organ or an ancestor centuries ago that ducked just in time to see a stone fly over his head instead of crushing his skull.

MONDAY, 22 AUGUST 2005

01:15

Epistemology: How do you know anything?

09:20

Debate, experiment, “For it is said …”

How do you know what is being said is true?

“Because …”

17:50

Am I still chasing after windeggs … okay, wrong question. Am I still running through a muddy field, chasing after a rainbow? Or am I actually going to arrive, eventually?

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